Has your marriage turn from the happy harmonious bliss into what feels like someone else’s nightmare? Does it leave you wondering where things went wrong? While this can be a very disconcerting feeling, it may be reassuring to know that you’re not the first couple this has happened to. Many marriages go through a period like this. It can be hard to pinpoint the exact time when it happens. For every couple it’s different. Not to suggest that every couple goes through this, but for those that do, each experience is unique. But as inevitable as death and taxes, the honeymoon period of any marriage will come to a close.
Fighting happens with any relationship. Husbands and wives, brothers and sisters, parents and children, cousins, and even step relations. Let’s not forget about the in-laws. That’s a story for another day. While fighting is not unusual, fighting day in and day out is something to be concerned with. Especially if all your disagreements seem to center around the same subject, and no real solution is ever found through the arguments. Letting this go on for too long can be detrimental to everyone involved.
An easy solution to this constant fighting would obviously be divorce. As with many things the easy solution is not always the best solution. A marriage is a precious thing, and while it may not be difficult to save, it’s truly worth the effort. That’s not to say they can all be saved, but in most case, it’s the effort that matters most.
With that in mind, that’s consider a few simple suggestions to help. While it may be simple reading about here an article, the tough part will be putting them into practice. Which of course, is where it really matters. There’s nothing really radically new here, but somethings just need repeating.
Everybody can talk. Everybody can express her feelings. Everyone can really get the point across when they have to. But, not everyone can listen in an empathetic sort of way. Quite often when two people are fighting it’s really just two people who keep talking and never stopped to listen. It often becomes just a question of who can impose their words and views on the other. While couples may physically be listening to what the other person is saying, they’re often not taking it to heart and giving it the respect it deserves. Hearing and really listening to what the other person has to say in a respectful manner may be all it takes to turn a heated argument into a constructive discussion.
Secrets can be devastating to the marriage. I’m not talking about the little ones, the little trivial things that we keep to ourselves, and never share with everyone. I’m talking about the big stuff. Things that are important to you, and your spouse. Family matters, important financial matters, and other events that have a serious impact on both your lives. Keeping secrets, is a sure sign of a lack of trust. It means, but you don’t trust your spouse to respect things that may be important to you. So, you keep them only to yourself. It’s a two-way street of course, that constant fighting can’t help. One way down the path to recovery, is to open up yourself a little bit and start trusting you spouse with some secrets you’ve been holding in. Start with small ones, and work your way up. It will not only help you learn to trust your spouse more, but hopefully, your partner will recognize the trust you placed in them.
The steps to improve her marriage can be difficult, but if successful, are worth the effort tenfold. The only way to find out, is to give it a try. What do you have to lose? Your marriage? Any effort at all, is better than just giving up.